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I have learned that recognizing these needs and their sources of fulfillment in my own life greatly enhances my ability to guide my clients. This takes time, humility, patience and (of course) horses!
As a child I was a perfectionist. A high achiever. Growing up in a small Scottish village made it relatively easy to be well behaved and top of my class, and to thus gain a sense of significance and acceptance. But then adolescence arrived. Like many of the teenagers I now work
"mistakes do not make you a bad person"
with, I struggled, and a key part of that struggle was realizing that ‘earning’ my way simply didn’t work. But I was one of the lucky ones; I had a horse. And with him I experienced grace. It didn’t mean ‘anything went’ (for either of us!) and our journey together certainly wasn’t easy! But my horse time and relationship opened my awareness to essential and ongoing life lessons I now seek to share with clients: that mistakes do not make you a bad person (or horse!), we may have valuable opportunities to grow when things seem the worst, and we remain loveable and significant - we can know we matter – within this imperfection.